知道

It is likely that some children and families in your care will face challenging life events that can put their mental health and overall well-being at risk. Such events might include death, divorce, job loss, relocation, violence in the home, or separation. As a child-development professional on or near a military installation, you will also likely work with children who experience deployment, or you may experience deployment in your own family. Deployment is a difficult time in the lives of children and families. Each family handles these challenges differently, and each child will have unique needs. Nevertheless, there are typical changes you can expect as children experience challenging and stressful transitions and life events.

本课程描述了压力事件对儿童生活的影响，同时突出了您在危机时期支持儿童及其家人的方式。您将在部署之前，期间和部署之后学习儿童和青少年的典型情感和行为体验，以及在部署的每个阶段支持儿童及其家人的方式。

Stress in Young Children's Lives

Unlike younger children, older children are typically able to verbally express what they are feeling, whether it is fear, anxiety, confusion, anger, sadness, or helplessness (Zero to Six Collaborative Group, National Child Traumatic Stress Network, 2010). Older children and youth may even be able to express the reasons behind their feelings. That being said, the level of self-awareness and verbal expression of emotions can vary from child to child. Children and youth may not always use their words, or even have the right words for the complex emotions they may feel (e.g., pride in their parents' military service, but also fear for their safety during deployment). Children's feelings can sometimes still be manifested in their behaviors, and this is especially true for young school-agers. School-age staff members can look to these behaviors as clues to what children are experiencing inside. When dealing with stressful events, children may: become clingy or fearful of new situations; demonstrate aggression; experience difficulty sleeping; or even appear to lose recently acquired skills. Let's consider deployment and how it can affect children and families.

Emotional Characteristics of Deployment

部署is a challenge for any family. For families faced with repeated or multiple deployments, the following seven-stage emotional cycle describes their typical experiences.

When families learn about the deployment, they are faced with preparing themselves financially, emotionally, and physically. The deploying parent may need to spend extra time at work prior to the departure. Both parents may spend a great deal of time getting ready for the deployment, packing, filling out paperwork, performing routine home or auto maintenance, finding babysitters or making extra childcare arrangements.

在部署之前

For many families, especially those who have been deployed before, there may be a period of detachment or withdrawal prior to deployment. Family members might emotionally prepare themselves for the pain of separation by isolating themselves. During this period, there might be fights or anger.

在部署之前，儿童体验了各种情绪。他们可能并不总是明白为什么他们的母亲，父亲或其他家庭成员必须离开。幼儿觉得他们的父母正在离开的“故障”是常见的。当孩子们对部署有关的问题时，这会发生这种情况。由于年轻的学龄儿童仍然发展了时间感，因此当一个家庭成员离开时，他们可能会感到焦虑或困惑。他们可能不明白分离将持续多久甚至是分离是暂时的。他们可能会被他们在家庭中看到的变化混淆。年龄较大的孩子，特别是那些在之前有经验部署的人可能会生气，悲伤，或害怕他们的父母离开。他们可能会对他们被要求接受的额外家庭任务感到沮丧（例如，更多的琐事）。部署父母可能需要在准备部署工作时花费额外的时间，并且配偶可以通过参加必要的法律，医疗或财务事项来安排作为单一父母的终身。

All of these emotions can show themselves in different ways. During this stage, the child may act withdrawn, sad, or quiet. Changes in routines may make the child more likely to act out. You might see more aggressive behaviors, tantrums, crying, or regressing (e.g., problems with self-care routines the child had previously mastered, like packing their own lunch).

During Deployment

When a family member begins their deployment, the at-home family members go through a period of disorganization. They may be sad and anxious about how the family will function. The at-home caregiver may feel overwhelmed by responsibility. It takes some time to settle into a new routine. Eventually the family recovers and develops routines that work for them; they have a new "normal."

Once the parent has deployed, children will go through a range of emotions. They may be sad, lonely, confused, angry, or scared. Fear of separation is one of the major concerns of school-age children. They may be afraid that the remaining parent will also leave. They may need constant reassurance that their parent or guardian is close by or will pick them up from your school-age program. They may be afraid that the deployed parent is in danger.

通过所有这些变化，您有时可能会看到儿童的行为更积极地表现。你也可能看到孩子们变得克林，害羞，安静或恐惧。恐惧对所有孩子都很常见，部署可能会增加他们的恐惧。他们可能会被成年人吸引舒适，或者对于年龄较大的儿童和青年，他们有时可能会退出成年人。重要的是要保持沟通的态度，并确保儿童和青年知道你在那里倾听并帮助他们在整个这个复杂的时间内。

After Deployment

返回的一天的临近,家庭prepares for more changes. They may be excited about the family member's return. They may feel a little nervous about whether their relationship with the deployed family member has changed. When the deployed family member returns, the family goes through another transition. The non-deployed caregiver might have mixed emotions about their changing role; this person has "done it alone" for quite some time and must renegotiate roles and expectations. Children may also have a hard time bringing the deployed family member back into daily routines, their roles and responsibilities may also need to shift. The deployed person may have doubts about where they fit into the family. Over time, the family stabilizes.

在父母退货之前和之后，孩子可能会兴奋和精力充沛。孩子们也可能对父母回来感到有点紧张和害羞。根据他们的年龄和经验与之前的部署，孩子可能会害怕他们不会识别他们的父母。他们也可能担心父母会再次离开。由于家庭成员访问和父母谈判新角色，他们可能会被他们家中发生的变化混淆。

See

程序如何支持可能面临挑战生活情况的儿童？听着这个经理讨论了她和她的计划如何支持经历部署的儿童和家庭。

Connecting During Deployment

做

保护因素：培养幼儿和家庭的恢复力

There are characteristics of children and families have attributes that can protect them as they go through stressful events. Research on resilience in children demonstrates that a significant protective factor for children is the consistent presence of a caring, positive, and protective caregiver (Zero to Six Collaborative Group, National Child Traumatic Stress Network, 2010). This person can be an ongoing resource for the particular child, and can encourage them to talk about their experience, and provide reassurance that adults in the child's life are working to keep them safe.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, you can support children facing stressful challenges when you:

• Maintain consistent program routines as much as possible. This provides children with a much-needed sense of stability and safety.
• 为孩子们谈论正在发生的事情提供机会，但如果他们不想，不要强迫他们谈谈。鼓励孩子谈论他们的感受并验证他们加强儿童的应对技能，因为他们听到他们所有的感受都可以。
• Be watchful of changes in children's behaviors over time. Changes in behaviors, for example acting out or withdrawing from friends, may indicate that a child needs extra support.
• 鼓励家庭与可能正在处理类似的压力园的其他家庭联系。与其他人联系允许家庭分享经验和应对策略。

The remainder of this lesson focuses on how you can support children and families before, during, and after deployment.

Support Before Deployment

Most importantly, you can help families find the resources they need, such as Military One Source (http://www.militaryonesource.mil/) or other resources available in their particular Service. Pre-deployment counseling can help families learn ways to prepare children for the deployment.

鼓励家庭诚实地与他们的孩子谈论部署。家庭帮助孩子理解是很重要的：

• Why the parent is leaving: The deploying parent has an important job to do and they know how to do the job well; they are not going alone.
• When the deploying parent is leaving
• 在父母离开之前，家庭会一起做些什么
• How the child will communicate with the parent while they are deployed
• 当父母离开时会保持这种情况：例如，一个父母仍将在这里吃早餐和晚餐，孩子仍将前往同一所学校和学龄的护理计划，这个家庭仍将共同开心等。

还鼓励家庭开始考虑帮助孩子感觉靠近部署的父母的方法。是否有父母和孩子在部署之前交换的个人物品（例如，图片或最喜欢的T恤）？

部署期间支持

During periods of deployment, it is especially important that you help the child and family maintain normal routines. Early in the deployment is not the time to transition a child to a new program or caregiver. Reassure the child that their parent or guardian will pick the child up as usual. Provide comfort. Answer the child's questions as simply and matter-of-factly as possible.

Integrate emotional literacy and problem-solving into your curriculum. Help children learn to recognize and deal with emotions. Talk about emotions every day. Look at pictures of children with different emotions, read stories about feelings and deployment, do activities that let the child identify and talk about their feelings. Help the child develop strategies for calming down and dealing with anger or fear.

Be prepared to help the parent with problems that arise. Parents may be confused by changes in their child's behavior. A parent may feel alone and unsure of how to provide discipline or guidance. The parent may feel frustrated by challenges--such as the child or youth "talking back," or not "paying attention" at school. The parent may go through periods of self-doubt, depression, or helplessness. Remember that it is important for parents to take care of their own mental and physical health. Help them connect with a Family Readiness Group, behavioral health counseling, or clergy. You can provide resources, training, and support around positive guidance and discipline. You can also help families think of ways to make life easier during the deployment. Use conversations, newsletters, and family nights to help families share ideas like:

• Keeping track of time by putting a coin in a jar each day of the deployment; the child can buy the parent a homecoming gift upon their return
• Going on family hikes
• 有一个家庭电影之夜
• Draw pictures or write letters to the deployed family member
• 在院子里设有一个家庭营地
• Schedule "date nights" (or days) with each child individually
• 创建一个家庭日历
• Figure out a special way to say goodnight to the deployed family member each night

Support After Deployment

Celebrate with the family and the child. Answer questions and let the child talk. Acknowledge the child's feelings, and help the child find words or pictures to describe those feelings. Make sure they know all feelings are OK. It is normal to feel shy or nervous when you haven't seen someone for a while. Recognize that this is a major transition for the family, and they will likely need to be connected with resources and supports. Work with your program to identify resources you can share.

Case Example

Read the following scenario and think about the suggestions provided to support children in your care during the different phases of deployment.

Wayne and Natalia, parents of a child in your program, both serve in the military. They met while on assignment in Asia and have been serving together around the world ever since. They love travel and living in new places. In their eight year marriage, they have had two international assignments. They had their first child, Ximena, six years ago, and she is now a child in your school-age program. Although they have moved frequently, they have never been deployed at the same time-- until now. Wayne and Natalia have both been assigned six month tours of duty. In some regards, Wayne and Natalia feel well prepared for the trip: they know Natalia's mother will care for Ximena, and they have completed all the pre-deployment paperwork for Ximena's insurance and care. They feel less prepared for the emotional toll of such a long separation. What can you and your program do to help this family, and particularly Ximena, before, during, and after the dual deployment?

You may consider the following:

• 鼓励家人开始与Ximena交谈即将到来的部署。
• 谈谈父母要去哪里以及为什么。
• 准备ximena将留下同样的事情：她会在奶奶那样睡觉，就像她有时现在一样，她仍然会去她的学校和你的学龄节目之前和你的学龄节目，她仍然发挥她最喜欢的游戏，吃饭她最喜欢的食物，拥有她的特殊娃娃和玩具。
• 关于她的父母和创建个性化的故事what is going on while they are away for Ximena to read while she is at school.
• Create special items that could comfort Ximena during difficult times in the program (e.g., make a pillow out of one of mom or dad's shirts for Ximena to snuggle in the reading area during quiet time).
• Provide Ximena with a consistent routine and predictable rituals at school.
• Include reminders at school about routines that seem difficult for Ximena. You can do the same about routines that have been challenging at home as well.
• Talk with Ximena about emotions and encourage her to share her emotions by writing notes to her parents. Comfort her when she needs extra support.
• 分享消息或注意到父母送到学龄儿童与Ximena共享。
• 为Ximena的问题或评论提供诚实的回应，对她的父母有关。例如，如果她分享她害怕，你可以说，“我有时也害怕，”或者你可以通过说：“你的妈妈和爸爸正在做他们能够安全的一切来解决一个关于她的父母的问题。”避免精心制作的反应，这可能压倒她。
• 当Ximena的父母回到家时，帮助Ximena谈论她的情绪：焦虑，羞怯，兴奋。确保她知道所有的情绪都可以。
• 组织一项特殊活动，曾经从部署中回来了Ximena和她的父母。例如，父母早餐，小吃或野餐。
• Encourage Ximena to express her feelings and share how she feels.

照顾好你自己

您为儿童和家庭提供了至关重要的支持。但是，如果你不照顾好自己，你就不能这样做。通过困难，有时悲惨时期帮助孩子们可以令人难以置信的挑战。你可能会发现你自己的心理健康反映了你周围的人。确保您花时间以您自己的需求。与周围的人交谈你的感受。与您的管理员讨论遇到部署或损失的家庭资源。照顾好自己会让你更能够照顾孩子。您还可以了解更多关于您自己的自我保健社会和情感学习教师(SELF-T)yabo电子游艺and theSelf & Cultural Understanding课程。